Single White Female

It’s an interesting thing being single, especially after being a bit of a serial monogamist myself. It’s almost as though you start to view the world from the outside in.

I have a single girl friend that used to say to me, ‘there are so many people in the world we haven’t even met yet’. It’s safe to say I didn’t do the math.  A part of me took it on board the other part went and jumped straight into another relationship.

After recently going on my first solo adventure travelling overseas, I started to see just how many people I hadn’t even met yet. I know it’s logical and I can’t possibly meet them all but I thought; how about I try and open myself up to the opportunity of meeting someone for the very first time?  Hell, why don’t I try it on a daily basis? Most of us don’t even realise how we are surrounded by; amazing, inspiring, creative, funny, intellectual human beings every single day.

My final destination on my trip was Mykonos/ Greece. As I waited for my driver to collect me from my hotel I felt so emotional, I didn’t want to leave all this. It was more than the sun, sand, parties, it was the people. It was the fact that so many people that I had met for the very first time were willing to help me, to take me in, to appreciate me for being me and they didn’t have to but they chose to.

What I realised then was I didn’t have to be in Greece to experience this; I didn’t have to be on holidays to meet people for the very first time. What was stopping me from experiencing all this in my very home town? So when I arrived back home I decided I had a choice. I could either sit back, watch my routine life go by, or I could be present in my life and actually start to live it.

Yes my new frame of mind had me making some interesting decisions that I may not have previously made.  But if I didn’t take the risk then I wouldn’t ever know if it was a good or bad decision.  And as long as I could learn something from the experience then how bad of a decision could it really be?

Not being in a relationship makes you start to question and think about what you really want out of one? Do you want one? Although I may not be in a monogamous relationship my life is made up of them, so many different scales and degrees of relationships; family, work colleagues, friends. When I think about how much time I’d like to dedicate to all the different facets of my relations I don’t think I’d even have time for a monogamist relationship. Obviously I have done this in the past but the thing is by dedicating more time and effort into a relationship it’s bound to have an effect on the others.

It’s interesting how the mind works, yes It’s what we do, it’s what we’ve done for years but why do we do it?; Lots of reasons; friendship, companionship, intimacy, love and children. I see many people in mediocre relationships; they choose to carefully select a significant other that they dedicate most of their time and attention too and even though their situation changes along with their happiness, they stay.

You may think I’m a cynic, slightly crazed but really I just like to think outside of the square and as a mentor once pointed out to me, the square doesn’t even exist. So why not think beyond everyday thoughts? I’d like yours.

This weekend away for my work Christmas dinner, further questions were raised around the ideals of relations and my ‘single’ status. I was told I “needed a man” by one a male.  A female acquaintance asked about my ‘partner’ I let her know I no longer had one. The response I got was “how old are you?”, “27” I replied. “Don’t worry you still have time” she said, then the friend perked up too “oh I don’t know we had kids at 25”. Meanwhile I’m thinking; hold up, stop the beat a minute I got something to say! I responded quite calmly; “I’m enjoying my life, yes I’d love to have kids one day but it’s not my sole purpose, I’m not going to rush into having them, find myself a partner because there’s an expiration date. I’m going to live my life with purpose and it will happen if it’s meant too”. I didn’t get much response to that. It didn’t really bother me because I’m happy. But what I find amusing is that they think it’s okay to judge my lifestyle, yet I would never dream of doing the same to them, if they’re happy with their; husbands, lovers, kids then good for them! As long as what they are doing isn’t compromising the happiness of others then, good on them. My goal is to be unapologetically me.

A male friend of mine arrived at the bar my work colleagues and I were at. He was with his girlfriend whom I hadn’t met before, the introduction I received was “Erin I know you don’t like to meet girlfriends but this is... (insert name here). Firstly if I truly appreciate and care about someone in my life then I want to meet their significant other, their children, their parents, their dog, you name it. Lucky I have thick skin because this insult was just adding to my night.  Due to the debauchery of an introduction I did everything in my power to make this lady feel comfortable, I mean I’m talking Oscar performance. Because I actually cared about how she was feeling.

The thing is just because I’m single; it doesn’t mean I want your boyfriend. I didn’t want him when I had one and I don’t want him now. I appreciate male and female relationships. I’ve even put myself on a ‘man drought’ don’t get me wrong I love me some man but I don’t need it for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Oh no I didn’t, yes I did! Did I mention I’m funny too? I’m on a journey of self discovery and I don’t want to blur my happiness by adding someone else to the equation, for the meantime anyway.

I just want to remove the question mark from ‘single and fabulous?’ and add that exclamation mark in bold. I ask, next time you go to judge that single friend or stranger, how bout you don’t, how about you just enjoy them for being them?

Below: Some of the fabulous women i spent my weekend with.

x Erin

 

 

 

 

 

           

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

De Clutter Your Life

After my recent overseas trip it came to my attention that I do not need so much stuff in my life to live happily. Trust me I’m an avid consumer I love; clothing, makeup, accessories, magazines, food, the works. Yes I may have only been away three weeks but living out of a suitcase just made me realise how little I need. So since my return I’ve slowly been chipping away at my house hold, de cluttering my home and lifestyle. There’s something about; throwing things out, donating or selling unused possessions that makes you feel good. I think we all know there’s things we could live without but perhaps don’t know where to start. Let’s see if I can help, here’s how I have been de cluttering my life.

WARDROBE

Let’s be honest here I have executed many wardrobe cleanouts but this time I have been brutal, I have even taken the nice pieces out to sell or donate. How do you choose? You have to be honest and not think twice, when you look at an item what are the first thoughts that come to mind? These are some of my triggers to clear out: too big, too small, uncomfortable, high maintenance, bad memories, needs repairing, haven’t worn it in forever. Now you have to do the same with your jewellery, bags and shoes.  Selecting the pieces to cut is only half the battle; you have to now plan how you are going to sell them. If it is a recognisable designer and you want a good price I’d recommend Ebay, if they are middle of the range id recommend a fashion market, or selling via face book and if you just want to get rid of the items and want to make a few bucks id recommend your local market. If you’ve given these options a few goes I would then give them to charity, trust me you will only feel better for it.

*One of my old wardrobes, clutter central!

BATHROOM

I can’t speak for every female but most I know have a bathroom cabinet filled to the brim with an array of beauty, skin and hair care products. They literally sit there expiring, gaining dust and pissing off our partners. So I’m cleaning it out. First pull it all out and see what is exactly there. Throw out anything that doesn’t look or smell right. According to makeup guru Bobby Brown these are the use by time frames for these products:

·         Blush- 2 years

·         Eyeshadow- 2 years

·         Eyeliner- 1 year

·         Liquid Foundation- 2 years

·         Moisturiser- 2 years

·         Powder- 2 years

·         Lipstick- 1 year

·         Lipliner- 1 year

·         Brow Pencil- 1 year

·         Concealer- 2 years

·         Cleanser- 1 year

·         Sponges- 6 months (wash after each use)

·         Mascara- 6 months

·         Brushes- wash every few weeks

After typing the above I know I am guilty of hoarding the products over time. I now want to get back in there and re de-clutter. Trust me once you start it feels so good you want to continue all over your house. My goal is to have one of each product; one shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, cleanser, foundation, etc. So I have started using old body washes as hand washes, I have my cheaper shampoo in the shower which I use for my first wash and my more expensive salon one for the second deeper cleanse, I do the same with my cleansers also. I refuse to buy any more body moisturiser until every lotion and hand cream is finished. With nail polishes, test it if its gluggy get rid of it, if you love the colour and have to keep it prolong its life with a few drops of nail polish remover and shake it up.  If there is a perfectly fine product that I know I won’t use I offer it to friends or family. Once again this makes you feel good.

Another place to dedicate a bit of time to is the medicine cabinet, you’ll be surprised how many medicines you’re hanging onto that are passed their expiration date, there will be many without boxes and you may not even know what they are for or do. Save the self medicating and get rid of them. Some pharmacies will dispose of these for you.

 

*Bathroom Cabinet Inspo

 

KITCHEN

Living on my own my kitchen is not too bad but often the kitchen is a magnet for clutter. Let’s start with the pantry; take it all out and check the dates, you’ll be horrified how long you have kept some things. Now you’ll realise just how many canned goods you have. You have a few options start planning your meals around these products or give some to your local charity that take canned goods. The fridge; if you can smell it needs a clean. I found the best way to prolong my fresh foods is prepping them and freezing them. After reading Sarah Wilsons’ I quit sugar for life cookbook I learnt that the freezer is my friend.

LOUNGEROOM

For me the main things I hoard here are; magazines, books, dvds, cds. If cds or dvds are scratched; bin, if you don’t watch or listen to donate or sell. I love giving my old magazines to doctor surgeries or hospitals. I once took a whole boot load to the hospital and the lady at the desk looked very pleasantly surprised. How nice that people waiting for love ones can have something different to read.

So there it is. My de clutter plan. Trust me once you start you can’t stop.

E.

 

 

HAIR RUT

I've become a bit complacent in the way I style my hair, actually lets be honest I'm down right lazy. I wash it, put some detangling spray, a little sea salt, root lifter and blast my hair with the hairdryer upside down, then give a spray of hold and voila. I usually wash it every second day. But the majority of days at work my hair ends up in a bun with a pencil through it. I've decided with a mane like mine, I have to start getting a little creative!

So I've given myself a challenge, 5 working days of different hairstyles and to try and challenge myself too, no buns with pencils through! I've also added my five working outfits for the week, I picked out the outfits and accessories on the Sunday and made a few changes due to the cooler climate arising in Tasmania. Only one outfit got the chop so I didn't do too bad! See the results below:

 

Monday's hair and outfit: Low pony, side parted with hair wrapped around to cover the band, simple and neat. Wearing: Staple the label skirt, Sass and Bide Top, Adorne necklace from #yeltuor

 

Tuesdays hair and outfit: I took sections of the hair around the crown, back combed, sprayed with hairspray to give a quiff effect and secured with two bobby pins. Wearing Finders Keepers top, Maud Dainty pants, Adorne Necklace, Senso Shoes from #yeltuor.

 

Wednesdays hair and outfit: Side ponytail parted to the side, I teased the hair before plaiting the sections loosely to give a messy thick plait. Wearing; Wish maxi dress, Sportsgirl shirt, Swarovski Necklace, Senso Shoes. Maxi dress and shoes from #yeltuor

 

 Fridays Hair and Outfit. Today the different dos were getting a bit much I was tempted to walk out the door with blow dried hair as per usual but I decided I had to stick to the challenge, so high pony it was, quick and easy. Wearing; Staple the label skirt, Talulah blouse, Jasmine Bloom Jewels and Mollini slides from #yeltuor.

 

Saturdays Hair and makeup. My favourite hairstyle for glamour; curls. I put my hair in a high pony and kept hot rollers in until cool. I put my hair in a pony first because it gives the curls a nice drop and looks less stage hair like around the face. I was super excited for a cooler day as i'd been saving this Lauren Vidal knit for a few months! I teamed it with a Moss and Spy skirt and last seasons boots and a Ted Baker coat for the morning. I did end up getting a little too toasty though!

So there we have it, challenge done. Its day two of the new week and I've stuck with the blow dried hair both days, its just so much easier. However I will try and make an effort to shake things up from time to time, I don't want to get too predictable.

Enjoy x E

I NEED SOME PEP

Some people may think of the Peplum as just a trend that will soon disappear. I believe it is a staple look that will be very strong for time to come. The peplum has many benefits, it's: fun, feminine, proportional, flirty and creates an interesting silhouette. It can create curves, give waist definition, revert the eyes from the hips and bottom. I would say the peplum works for all body shapes except the apple, if you are rounder in the middle it may accentuate this.   

 

 For me I love the feminine and structured style of a peplum. It gives me waist definition and works for winter and summer looks.  You can wear it in; skirt, top, dress and jacket form.

 

If you haven't tried it yet, give it a whirl, give your outfit a little pep.

 

x E 

Cue peplum top and skirt.

Rachel Gilbert Peplum dress.

Cue peplum top.

Rachel Gilbert peplum dress.

Finders Keepers peplum bustier, worn over tank dress. @yeltuor

Natasha Gan peplum dress @yeltuor

Finders Keepers neon peplum top @yeltuor

Cue peplum top.

 

 

SUMMER SKIN

This summer I’ve been cutting back on the war paint. I’ve been a girly girl in love with hair, fashion and makeup since the Spicegirls were singing ‘if you wanna be my lover’.  I don’t know if its age or climate but this season I’m trying let my skin shine through. I love a finished face and as Calvin Klein said “The best thing is to look natural, but it takes make-up to look natural.” I’d much rather be complimented on the way my skin looks, or whether I’m glowing with health, not that my makeup shines more than me. For day to day anyway, night time warrants some extra fireworks in regards to makeup.

So how did I achieve the more natural face? I ditched the foundation and stared using a BB cream, Revlon is my brand of choice, I mix this with Revlon skin lights illuminator and use a Maybelline concealer under the eyes and to cover any skin imperfections. I seal the liquid with Mineral Glow colourless finishing powder, create contouring on the cheekbones, forehead and chin with the Mineral Glow bronzing powder and follow with the Mineral Glow Blushed Bombshell (for extra glow that gives anyone the allure of extra hours slept.) I honestly think as the years tick by, you should gradually cut back on the heavy makeup, it can add years to your face. X E

 

My Summer Skin Essentials